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Parenting: Blaq Kharma on Mommyhood

Parenting: Blaq Kharma on Mommyhood

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Congratulations to On The Rise Magazine editor Candace Smith aka Blaq Kharma.  The Monday night host of On The Rise Radio’s “The Blaq Hour” who is known as “ya number one homie” announced that she was expecting a girl.

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Initially Kharma was distraught about her pregnancy.  She confided on her blog http://mymommyhoodadventures.com

“I was never one of those little girls that dreamed about becoming a mom. I would hear most women talk about how it is the most empowering yet tiring jobs that they could ever do in life. I believed that and respected that and immediately decided that it wasn’t for me. Let’s be real, I enjoyed being selfish and only having to worry about me.

At the age of 27, God has blessed me with the burden that I never wanted: Motherhood. All of the cliques are right. Knowing that you are about to be responsible for molding another human being’s life instantly changes your state of thinking. “Half steppin’” is no longer acceptable on any fronts.  When you learn that you are about to become someone’s mom, you instantly push yourself harder.

For me, I think that the gift of motherhood was God’s way of clicking the light on and telling me to wake up and push a little harder. With that being said, this is my first baby. There is so much going on that I am not used to. This blog is me documenting my experience from the womb, to the first birthday, through the first year. This is my mommyhood adventures.”

Since then, she’s been one of the most vocal (and public) expected mom’s in the Atlanta On The Rise Community media scene.  She speaks frequently on the wonders (and woes) of pregnancy.  She also takes some looks at health tips, celebrity baby bumps, and pure comedy as only Blaq Kharma can deliver.  Taking her situation in stride, and now seeing it as a blessing, she keeps track of her baby’s development and her pregnancy in Blaq Kharma style.  (Click Here For Pics) The BABY BUMP GROWTH DIARY.

My Mommyhood Adventures blog is a  testimony of how faith and friendship work.   Candace came out of the horrible relationship in which she was deceived, only to  learn that she was pregnant. Fighting depression, anger, frustration, fear, and hopelessness…all while losing her job and facing now where to live, she was faced with the hardest decisions of her life, one that would make her bond with her journey with her daughter Evelyn (named for her Grandmother).  It’s the first time we’ve seen this side of Blaq Kharma, and we even caught her online saying “Happy Kharma”.


OTR:  What was the scariest thing about the thought of the “pregnancy experience”?

Blaq Kharma:  The scariest thing about being pregnant is the thought of something being wrong with your baby or you spontaneously losing it. When I was 23 years old, I had a miscarriage. I went through it alone and it bothered me for the longest time. At the end of the day, it is all worth it if she is born healthy

OTR:  As an entertainment blogger, you come across a lot of celebs and their famous “Baby Bumps”.  You display your own baby bump progress on your blog site.  Were you as intrigued  to see the progress of your baby bump as we are with the mainstream celebs?

Blaq Kharma: Yes i’m at 5.5 months now and up until this point, people have been saying, “You don’t look pregnant.” Now you can see it with no problem. Actually seeing the bump is like a reminder that this is real. There is a baby inside of there that is growing, giving me gas, and kicking.

OTR:  You’re an artist, a media journalist, a host, and now you’ve begun doing pr services.  Does the pregnancy slow you down?

Blaq Kharma: It’s funny because, you would think that it would especially as a new single mommy but it hasn’t. I have a great support system that backs me up. If anything, I have taken on more tasks since being pregnant. This baby has made me grow up in areas were I needed to grow. When you know that you are responsible for another life that will depend solely on you, you can’t make excuses. The baby has made me buckle down and focus more on career moves that are smarter.

OTR:  In gearing up for baby Evelyn, you made the decision to no longer be a pet owner.  What are your feelings on that decision now?

Blaq Kharma: I feel like that was the best decision for everyone involved. The dog, baby, and me. I knew that with everything that was going on in my life, I wasn’t going to be able to be the great pet owner that my dog deserved. At the end of the day, I put him in a “no kill” shelter. I didn’t want to ruin a great dog because I couldn’t be the owner that he deserved. I’m happy knowing that he is better off. I prayed over the situation and was at peace with leaving him after I said “goodbye”.

OTR:  It seems you already have the “responsible parent” attitude, even moreso.  I agree with you.  Great job on finding that kind of shelter.  Kharma, you do your research, indeed.  Have you decided on a birthing method yet?  If so, what have you decided?

Blaq Kharma: I honestly would like to go the natural route with no drugs. I know that sounds crazy but in my mind, I look at it like, women have been having babies without meds since the beginning of time. Childbirth was not designed to be a walk in the park. I am happy as long as I can push her out naturally. I pray to God they do not try to cut me open.

OTR:  You are very brave.  We know you’ll do just fine however it turns out.  What advice can you give to women who find themselves deceived in a relationship only to find themselves pregnant?

Blaq Kharma: Pray on it and wait for God to answer you. Don’t listen to what others have to say. Deciding to keep life or not is a choice that you don’t make over night and you don’t talk about it in casual convo. Whether you decided to be a parent or not, the choice that you make will forever effect your life. My pregnancy brought me closer to God. I had a lot of doubts about faith before my daughter entered my life. I know God is real and not a make believe character because at the end of the day when I felt that I had no one, God showed up and the right people were strategically placed in my life. At the end of the day, carrying life is a gift.

OTR:  That’s so true.  I appreciate that advice, especially for our young sisters.  Being a public figure, what made you decide to speak out on your situation?

Blaq Kharma: Why not. I know that I am not the only woman that has been in a situation like this. I was lied to horribly by someone that I dated and really loved. At the end of the day, this person who claimed to love me so much tried to destroy me and slander my name. THAT HURT…. Dealing with a pain like that alone will make you crazy. You have to recoup and heal from that. Knowing that there is someone out there that identifies with you starts to heal. It’s like saying, “Hey, I fell and it hurt but I have to get back up” I am not one to keep secrets. I’d rather keep it real. Secrets create extra stress and being a new mommy/role model, I want to focus on that. No stress at all. So why not speak the truth…

OTR:  How did your fans react to news of your pregnancy?

Blaq Kharma:  People just weren’t expecting it. I’m not anti-children, I just have always made it known that I enjoyed living my life only having to worry about me and my well being. Outside of the shock, a lot of people were supportive and told me that I am at a great age to have children. A lot of friends have told me that they can’t wait to see how I interact with her once she is here.

OTR:  Be honest, do you still get a lot of flirting and people trying to spit “game”? lol

Blaq Kharma:  You know what, I actually do. I would have never guessed that I’d get the response from men that I do while pregnant. You should have seen this dude trying to pick me up in the Kroger parking lot yesterday. It was so cute but of course, I didn’t give him no play. I had to hold my laughter in because he was really trying. It’s almost like men are drawn to me. It kind of makes me nervous. A man is the farthest thing from my mind right now. I’m just in love with the idea of raising my daughter. Plus I am still going through the healing process after everything that I went through went my daughter’s father.

OTR: Well, you’re a beautiful person, anyway, so I’m not surprised.  And we can certainly understand that.   Will you post pics of Evelyn right away, or will you hold out like other celebs…in other words, when will Baby Evelyn make her debut in the media (and can On The Rise Mag put in our plea for an exclusive)?

Blaq Kharma: Thank you I most def will be posting pic of her. I already got her first photo shoot set up. I may put her i baby modeling. I plan to keep writing on mymommyhoodadventures.com through her toddler years. Everything is new to me. It’s a completely different ball game when you’re the parent and not a big sister. A lot of my posts make people laugh. You can tell that I am new to this

OTR:  We appreciate you for sharing your experience, and look forward to reading more of your adventures.  What other projects are you currently working on?

Blaq Kharma: Well, I am launching my own PR Firm specializing in crisis management. I am still running Kharma’s World and the mommy blog. In addition to that, I am also doing The BlaqHour radio show on On the Rise Radio and I contribute the the magazine as well as Empress Chronicles. I have also partnered up with a good friend of mines and we are shooting a weekly webisode series called “Going Off!!!!” I’m just keeping busy.

OTR:  Any last shout-outs?

Blaq Kharma:  S/O to everybody that stayed down with me.

 

Thanks to Blaq Kharma for that exclusive and on the spot interview, and her honesty.  Being a single mother is not easy, but she is preparing for it in great strides.    Not only has Kharma gone through her pregnancy without a partner, she’s maintained her career, all while still in the mist of struggle.  She’s On The Rise, but on her way to the top.  Reaching out to her fans and including them in she and Evelyn’s journey, she welcomes you to follow her unscripted reality.

Visit My MommyHood Adventures http://mymommyhoodadventures.com/

Follow Blaq Kharma at:

http://twitter.com/blaqkharma

http://facebook.com/blaqkharma

http://instagram.com/blaqkharma

http://kharmasworld.com

Tune In Monday Nites @OnTheRiseRadio from 9-11pm/est and Like her show fanpage https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Blaq-Hour/520104328031897

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